BREAKING: Religious Extremist Ted Cruz Drops Out

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It is with great pleasure – but with a great deal of trepidation – that we can announce that religious extremist Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) is dropping out of the Republican presidential race after being trounced by front-runner Donald Trump in today’s Indiana primary.  Just days after declaring fellow misogynist, radical anti-choice activist, and disgraced ex-HP CEO Carly Fiorina his running mate, Cruz is forced to drop out of the race as it became clear that the American people despise him for what he represents – and for what he’s done to this country.

One of the only times Donald Trump was ever accurate was when he dubbed the Texas Senator as “Lyin’ Ted.” Cruz’s platform was based on a series of shameless lies that could be debunked by the most cursory Google Search – the Affordable Care Act is not the greatest job killer in the nation and is in fact a monumental success,  and Planned Parenthood is not “selling baby parts” as he so crudely put it.

Cruz was a misogynist and a hypocrite of the highest order. He fought to install his twisted, perverse interpretation of evangelical Christianity into the laws that govern this great nation; a draconian puritanism that the militants of Daesh (ISIS/ISIL) would find to be very familiar. He shut down the government for his own personal gain, costing our nation $25 billion in taxpayer dollars and pioneering the obstructionism that afflicts Congress to this day. He is a universally despised shell of a man, a liar and a cheat who will stop at nothing to further his own ambitions. The kind of man who would block emergency relief funds for poisoned children and demonizes transgender Americans for cheap political points.

While we will miss the flood of jokes that accompanied his candidacy – like that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer, that he was the lead singer of the metal band Stryper, that he likes to dress as a woman and go on the Maury Povich Show, we will not miss having to look at the kind of face that has its very own descriptor in German for its punchability, nor listen to his odiously smug voice spread hate in the name of “family values.”

Good riddance to you, Ted Cruz. There are no words that can heal what your lies have done to this nation, but rest assured you will be mocked for the rest of your years. The newspapers in your own state said that ““the dislike the man engenders is so intense it’s hard to find a historical precedent for it.” They aren’t wrong. Know that the American people reject your hatred, your bigotry, your fundamentalism, you heartless beast.

For a full description of why the author despises Ted Cruz with such a fury, click here.

The author also has a Twitter account, which he’d much appreciate a follow on

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Colin Taylor

Colin Taylor is the managing editor of Occupy Democrats. He graduated from Bennington College with a Bachelor's degree in history and political science. He now focuses on advancing the cause of social justice and equality in America.


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