It’s impossible to tell for sure if Donald Trump’s children believe all, any, or none of the ridiculously hyperbolic things they say about their father. As Junior, Eric, and Ivanka tell it he’s the greatest president ever elected in any country anywhere. They present him as God’s gift to democracy, a staggering genius of historic proportions, a brilliant businessman, a devout Christian, and a staunch patriot.
The truth, of course, is that Donald J. Trump is none of these things. He’s a cruel, narcissistic ignoramus and by just about every metric he was the worst president in American history. Whenever one of his putrid progeny lavishes praise on him, those of us not infected with the MAGA delusion can’t help but laugh. Future generations will look at his children’s sycophancy with astonishment.
Today, little Donald Trump Junior, ever questing in vain to secure his psychopathic father’s love, penned a tweet attacking President Biden. He claimed that Biden “really makes reading a teleprompter look hard,” a painfully oblivious insult given the manner in which his father constantly struggles to string together so much as coherent thought. Biden dismantled Trump during the debates and Trump’s public rhetoric since his defeat has only grown more disjointed and confused.
Biden really makes reading a teleprompter look hard.
— Donald Trump Jr. (@DonaldJTrumpJr) August 3, 2021
Twitter users were quick to mock Don Jr. for his asinine tweet by trotting out some of his father’s greatest hits. As the old adage goes, those who live in glass houses paid for by their daddy’s ill-gotten money shouldn’t throw stones…
Just wait till you meet Donald Trump.
— CHIDI®️ (@ChidiNwatu) August 3, 2021
Your dad is about as articulate as a drunken circus chimp with or without a prompter – and you sound like a ferret on meth in even videos you could have re-recorded.
— The Hoarse Whisperer (@TheRealHoarse) August 3, 2021
Your dad makes drinking from a bottle of water look hard, dude.
— Tess Gregory (@themustress) August 3, 2021
HAHA Your Dad didn’t know where Kansas was, made the name of a country up (NAMBIA) got the names of people and places wrong even when he was on that place or the person was in front of him. Your dad has a grade 3 reading level
— martin mcmahon (@MartinJmcmah) August 3, 2021
"Together we're going to DEFUND our freedoms."
— Frank Amari (@FrankAmari2) August 3, 2021
Check yourself, Junior..
I wouldn't go there.. pic.twitter.com/zDhxogAHpU
— Angie Nickamin✡️ (@nickamin20) August 3, 2021
Ok, I'll play.
Your dad really makes standing look hard.
Your dad really makes talking look hard.
Your dad really makes holding & drinking from a bottle look hard.
— David Gottesman (@dgotte75) August 3, 2021
Your Dad was so great. I loved his "lawnmakers" and Rev War taking of airports speech. So well read.
— PoliSciJunkie (@JunkiePoli) August 3, 2021
Ask your daddy about the time he said in a speech that airplanes flew during the Revolutionary War
— HolliWinters (@HolliWinters) August 3, 2021
Meanwhile, your dad can't read polysyllabic words.
Translation: that means words with more than 1 syllable.
— Tx Meema (@PattyAnne67) August 3, 2021
Joe can ride a bike and drink water with one hand.
— That Vaccinated Karen (@KarenVaccinated) August 3, 2021
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Rob Haffey is a writer, filmmaker, and winner of the ScreenCraft Writing Fellowship. He is a graduate of Drexel University.