Now Reading
Military advice from a 5-year-old and other highlights of Trump’s Alabama rally last night

Military advice from a 5-year-old and other highlights of Trump’s Alabama rally last night

Advertisement Above

While most people on the left have trouble listening to Donald Trump for 90 seconds, the crowd of MAGA fans gathered in a cow pasture in Cullman, Alabama last night eagerly endured a full 90 minutes of the disgraced former president’s pitiful attempts at oration.

For their trouble, the crowd — which endured long waits, bad weather, and a host of other GOP extremists, including Republican Senate candidate Congressman Mo Brooks (R-AL) and conspiracy theorist Mike Lindell, the My Pillow CEO,  prefacing the former president’s lengthy speech — were treated to plentiful attacks on the current President Joe Biden and mountains of treasonous praise for the new Taliban regime in Afghanistan.

Trump also gave a greatest hits performance of his most popular grievances including his old favorite: “The Election Was Stolen.”

Continuing his romp through his catalog, the former president moved onto “Mask Mandates Are an Assault on Your Freedom,” as he joked about the resurgent COVID-19 pandemic that was surely gathering strength from its circulation among the mostly maskless crowd present for the rally.

Sponsored Links

Sponsored Links

Click here to leave a comment

Sponsored Links

Add your name to demand Congress raise the minimum wage to $15 per hour!

Having finished his opening medley with his old standard, “I Would Have Done Everything Better,” Trump Turned his attention to military matters.

Dare to say, a 5-year-old’s strategic advice would probably be preferable to anything that Trump or his sycophants could come up with on their own.

The ex-president almost lost the crowd, however, when he dared to suggest that they take the vaccine that he likes to take credit for developing despite his overall bungling of America’s pandemic response during his term in office.

Outside observers might postulate that Trump got his revenge on the crowd for their negative response to his vaccine suggestions with this next query.

Please! Anything but being forced to imagine that!

They say that you can take the measure of a man by the company he keeps, and Trump set a low bar with the praise he doled out to his associates in his right-wing political con game.

Among his shoutouts were to his female counterpart in sheer offensiveness, Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) and the aforementioned Mike Lindell.

Trump forced the crowd to sit in the rain through a full hour and a half of this drivel.

Sadly, the crowd ate it up outside of that derision for the vaccine suggestion.

Having left such a bad taste in the mouths of our readers with all of the idiocy Trump displays in the clip above, let’s leave you with a palate cleanser of sorts.

Here’s John Coltrane with a live version of “Alabama” that paints a much more beautiful portrait of the state than any Trump rally ever could accomplish.

Follow Vinnie Longobardo on Twitter. 

Original reporting by Aaron Rupar at Vox.

We want to hear what YOU have to say. Scroll down and let us know in our comment section!

The Occupy Democrats Election Fund is a political organization that supports ONLY good Democratic candidates

Please consider supporting the fund. Thank you!

© 2019 Occupy Democrats. All Rights Reserved.

Scroll To Top