By now, you’ve certainly heard about non-fungible tokens (or NFTs), the latest craze to sweep the cryptocurrency world. What exactly an NFT is hard to explain, because it doesn’t make any sense, but ostensibly an NFT is a digital object that confers ownership of a piece of digital media, and it’s stored in the Ethereum blockchain, which is a digital network of transactions powered by feeding trees from the Amazon rainforest into a woodchipper to power a trailer full of computers which perform the calculations to maintain the network.
The NFT market has recently exploded in recent months, as videogame companies, bands, and major corporations try to get in on the action. Headline after headline announces yet another staggering new expenditure of digital currency to secure ownership of, like, a hideous cartoon of a monkey wearing a hat and smoking a cigarette, or even just a low res-image of a pet rock:
ROCK THREAD: Why I spent $46,300/15 ETH for a PNG file of a grey pet rock and why I think it could end up being one of the best investments I make since getting into crypto. A thread (continued) #EtherRock #EtherRocks pic.twitter.com/kkkUVGFKh7
— z (@degenharambe) August 7, 2021
If you think this sounds like a ridiculously asinine cover-up for money laundering and scams, you’d be right.
Which is why it was only a matter of time before the biggest scam artists in the United States, the Trump family, stepped into the digital world of NFTs. On Thursday, Melania Trump announced that she was launching an NFT project starring — of course — her own eyes. Entitled “Melania’s Vision,” the token platform ostensibly embodies her “passion for the arts” and her support for children in the Be Best initiative.
Melania puts her first NFT up for sale: Former First Lady opens cryptocurrency bidding in auction for a watercolor painting of her eyes and an audio message of 'hope' to raise money for foster care charities https://t.co/pM12GNTVKS pic.twitter.com/gqyLimy5rC
— Showbiz (@showbiznotices) December 16, 2021
The wife of America’s most unrepentant con man promised that a “portion” of the profits will go to kids aging out of foster care.
Melania Trump is launching an NFT. The first embodies her "cobalt blue eyes" and a portion of the proceeds will assist kids aging out of foster care.
("Parler is powering the platform.") pic.twitter.com/p63QLtKG5u
— Josh Wingrove (@josh_wingrove) December 16, 2021
Allow us all a hearty roll of the eyes.
This is the same family whose charitable foundation was dissolved by the state of New York for committing a wide range of abuses, including bribing public officials and purchasing personal items for Donald Trump himself, like a Tim Tebow football helmet. The very same family who was busted funneling money that was supposed to be going to a children’s hospital into their own businesses.
Does anyone believe that the former First Lady will actually be donating any proceeds to a charitable cause?
Judging by the responses to the news on social media, the answer is a resounding no.
— Andy Ostroy (@AndyOstroy) December 16, 2021
— Richard Hine (@richardhine) December 16, 2021
[spouse of reviled political figure] and [obvious crypto based scam fad] doing something for [make up a charity] but is really [name some kind of a scam] pic.twitter.com/q9uBaPejDS
— Oliver Willis (@owillis) December 16, 2021
Melania Trump will Like Lara Trump who funneled Dog Rescue Charity money into Donald Trump’s pocket… Or Eric Trump who stole
from a children’s cancer charity…she's a grifter.
— Renee R (@Rae83403106) December 16, 2021
— Michigan GOP Watch (@MiMagaWatch) December 16, 2021
Nothing says “I’m a grifter” like a former First Lady creating her own cryptocurrency. https://t.co/K35GP4NgFl
— Dr. John Biggan (@Biggan4Congress) December 16, 2021
"There's a sucker born every minute"
Just light the dollar bill on fire, at least you will enjoy the momentary flash of fire …
PT Barnum's axiom lives and they are counting on it. https://t.co/FwOcTliVlE
— Christopher Burgess (@burgessct) December 16, 2021
I heard Melania Trump wants to make and sell NFT artwork of herself.
Here's one she could use, right? pic.twitter.com/x8qGLphxlz
— Matthew Sheffield (@mattsheffield) December 16, 2021
Please CALL your Senator TODAY @ 202-224-3121. tell them to support the Sergeant First Class Heath Robinson Honoring Our PACT Act of 2022.
Opinion columnist and former editor-in-chief of Occupy Democrats. He graduated from Bennington College with a Bachelor's degree in history and political science. He now focuses on advancing the cause of social justice and equality in America.